Currently, my eyes are heavy. Like, squinty-heavy. Wishing, hoping for a nap but I honestly don’t think that’s in the cards for me today.
My cup of coffee is sitting here next to me, almost begrudgingly because, dangit! I wasn’t going to have coffee today. I was going to be awake. Strong. Show that coffee pot who’s boss.
I had to smile that recently I’ve gladly poured my International Delight into my morning cup. That vanilla creamer so sickeningly sweet, void of dairy. Yes. No milk to be found. Surely, this creamer is eating my insides and is not exactly the “natural” avenue I intended to go. Never-the-less, it makes my coffee sweet. Enjoyable. And, really? It’s cheaper.
With whiny children in the background and my coffee brewing in the chill of the morning air, I thought about you.
The mom doing the same thing I am today. Trying to get on top of the laundry pile, love and train your kids. Hopefully without killing anyone in the process.
The dad that never gets a mention because his wife is working, or maybe even left him, and he’s got the same chores and concerns that are on my heart today as well.
The college-age kid stressed to the max about upcoming tests and quizzes. Wondering if they’ll make it through to the end of the year.
The middle-aged woman uttering desperate prayers that her parents might make it through just a couple more nights. That the cancer wouldn’t take them so quickly.
So, I thought about you all, pouring my coffee. About your lives, how they look different from mine; how they look nearly identical.
Different faces, same emotions. In various cities, the same concerns.
Tired of it.
Just. Plain. Tired.
And I’m not even in the thick of a hardship right now. But just tired. And contemplative.
Dear sister, dear brother. I get you. I SO get you.
I see that fake smile you plaster on.
I see those puffy eyes, trying to mask your tears.